When you come home, do baby clothes and toys litter your Victorian recreation living room that used to be perfect as an adult space? Is your romantic bedroom littered with stuffed animals and a changing table? This could be part of the problem slowing down your marriage. Anyone can feel romantic on a velvet couch with hardwood furnishings and a calm fountain in the corner. It is significantly harder to be intimate in a big nursery full of screaming children.

Try making your home environment as peaceful as you can. Distractions like the television and loud mealtime chatter can jack up your nerves to a breaking point. Have a peaceful family meal. Save your complaints for another time. Mealtime will become a chore if it is a catered forum for everything the kids did wrong and the leftover chores on the honey do list. Scented candles and soft music will help keep everyone feeling peaceful. Trade your bulbs to a lower wattage to save energy and create a calmer lighting.

Clutter in your home can be another excuse for adults not to be intimate. Put the kiddy toys away, and get a stowing system for the laundry so baby blankets do not get slung anywhere. There is nothing more frustrating than adults trying to get in the mood and stepping on building blocks on the floor.

You will not even make it to the bedroom if your romance has dulled too much. Keep things fun and spicy in your marriage. Have a pillow fight, introduce some bedroom games, discuss adding adult toys to the mix, take a bubble bath and pour her some champagne, or slowly feed eachother strawberries and other pieces of fruit.

Be careful with the adult toys and games. Be sure to discuss these things with your spouse. Nothing will kill the mood than hearing her ask what kind of woman you think she is. Be honest with eachother about your desires, and encourage your spouse to be honest with you as well.

Play board games geared toward married couples to drum up ideas. Ask your spouse where they think you need improvement and what would make them more happy. Hit your local bookstore for books on marriage and communication.

The key is communication. If you never speak up, your spouse does not know what you need. After all, you did not marry a mindreader! Encouraging your husband or wife to speak up will complete the circle, and you both will have a better idea of how to spice things up.